Conscience - chapter 2

The flat was quiet, but messy. A typical home for university students. It wasn't big, nice or clean, but it still was better than good. The guy dropped his bag on the floor right in the hallway, kicked off his shoes and entered (I guess) his room. I felt sorry for still not knowing his name, but I didn 't really hear anyone saying it and didn't remeber reading it anywhere. The apartment was kinda cosy though. There was two bedrooms on the left, a seperated bathroom and restroom on the right, a living room and an american style kitchen up ahead. They had different kinds of consoles, stereo, owen, fridge (which was quite empty, the stock was maybe enough for one day), microwave... well pretty much everything two twentysomething-year-old guys could need. Yes, as I found out my chosen one had a roomate...and he was a guy considering all the stuff in the other bedroom.

I entered the other bedroom and found my owner sitting at his desk studying. Well calling him my owner was pretty funny as I was the one who told him what to do, but I was his conscience. Well... I don't really care. I sat down onto his bed and watched him turning pages for a while. Damn, I had to start doing things, following him everywhere like a puppy didn't make much sense. I took a deep breath and stood up. "Just be close and whisper!" Well, let's try. A slowly took a few steps and leaned forward so that my mouth was next to his ears. I was thinking what to tell him for some seconds and I decided that maybe I should start with something very simple.

"Stand up!" I said quietly, but... nothing happened. There's something wrong. Maybe I wasn't loud enough, wasn't quiet enough,wasn't close enough? I tried all these, but nothing worked. Then suddenly... and idea hit me. I leaned forward again.

"You want to stand up."

And like it was a magic spell, he stopped doing what he was doing pushed himself away from the desk and stood up. It worked, it really worked.Of course it wasn't such a mechanic deed. The motions were smooth and noone would be able to tell the he was actually following orders. Well, perhaps because he wasn't. He wanted to stand up. Haha. And as soon as I interacted with him, we became connected somehow. I could feel his thoghts, joy, suspense. But I was  the one who cleaned up the mess and told him which though he should listen to. How things work was pretty complicated, I couldn't explain everything, but from now on I somehow felt the system. Of course I still needed to get used to things but now I understood.

"It feels hot in here. Maybe you should take off your shirt!" and he did as I checked him from head to toe once again. "You feel kinda hungry, you should look for something to eat...Maybe it would be a good idea too to have something under your hand to snack on while studying." I heard my words echoing as his own thoughts, and then he said to himself:

"Ugh, do we have something to eat?"

I raised my hand in an "after you" motion. ...I'm an idiot. Oh, whatever!

He dropped his shirt that was still in his hand to the floor and then headed to the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. As this was the fridge of two student young men, there were mainly leftovers from home and deep-frozen stuff in it. He reheated some pizza at first. Down with no problem. Then some meatloaf with bread and mayonaise. No problem. But then I hear that he was lingering, a thought was flying around in his mind saying that maybe that was enough for now.

"Yeah, you ate a bit more than usual, especially that this was only a snack. But damn, you did well today on practise. You deserve this! And actually this feels quite good."

So he kept on eating for a while. He made omlette, then 'mákos guba' out of poppy seed and crescents, then had stuffed cabbage... that was a lot of food he was packing away. I guess he became too uncomfortable when he unbuckled his belt and unbuttoned his jeans. Anyway,he still managed to eat quite a bit of ice cream afterwards.
He dropped everything and sat back. I knew from his thoughts and heavy breathing that he was stuffed like never before. Damn, he actually pretty much emptied the kitchen! And I was definately proud of him, but before I could tell him anything he dozed off and was quietly snoring on the sofa. I couldn't do anything about that, anyway it was surely the best for him to sleep it off.

Maybe two hours passed when he opened his eyes. He was still a bit groggy, as he looked around I heard the sleepy thought: "Glad Péter is away for this week, I have time to deal with this mess." Yeah different dishes and wrappers were everywhere. And then came the second thought: "I need a cigarette." I wanted to stop him as he was searching for the pack, but the need was stronnger. Anyway, I still decided to make him quit smoking while he put on only a jacket and stepped outside to the balcony.
He lit a cigarette and started puffing the smoke. He was still bloated from the feast he had two hours ago, his jens were still unbuttoned. Anyway, the chilly weather waked him up so after that he went back to studying... now with some snacks.
I spent the remaining of the day planning. Quitting smoking was a bit longer process but was still an important factor... And making him lazy. Yes. He can as much as a village, but if he still works out as a bodybuilder he won't gain any weight...well, at least not fat. So yeah, today was quite productive.

Conscience - chapter 1

My memory had more holes than a kitchen sponge. The last thing I remembered was a pair of headlights coming towards me and tires screeching as I was soaking wet. Of course I guessed what happened, I'm not that dumb. The strange thing was that there was nothing more. I couldn't remember being hit, or pain, or anything. I was still sanding in the middle of the pedestrian crossing. At first I didn't get it... or just... I don't know. I saw people assembling in front of a car. A man jumped out of it, he was shocked I could see that. I wanted to go and check out what was this all about. That was when I heard a mild voice.

"Don't go there!" said the apparition

Normally I would freak out, but now I was just puzzled.

"Why?"

"There is nothing you have to see." There was somthing in him, I just felt I shoudl listen to him. "Come!" he said and I willingly followed him. After a while we stopped, and I couldn't resist anymore.

"Who are you?" I inquired

"I was your conscience." "Was?" I asked immediatly "Yes,...was. Consciences can't have their own consciences."

Guess he noticed the confused expression on my face, or that I just didn't say a word.

"Look at your hands!" he advised and so I did.

It seemed impossible. They were white...but more like ground glass, you could see some colour from behind them. I just kept turning them back and forth, but nothing clicked until I cought a glimpse of my reflection in the shopwindow. I was just a... shape, that just reminded you of a human. No face, nothing... just the shape.

"I am a ghost?" this sounded so absurd.

The apparition laughed.

"There's no such thing as ghosts. What this world calls ghosts are consciences who don't have owners at that moment." he explained "Look, from now on time is meaningless for you. You can stay forever, but you has to stay for at least twenty years and have to have at least one person under your wings over this period. Choose wisely, as you will have to stick with him or her for at least five years." "So time isn't that meaningless." I interrupted, but again he just smiled "To tell you the truth, time flies by so fast for us. I mean I died... let me think... 56 years ago."

"That's... 1956... The revolution??" my eyes got wide open

"Yes... those communist bastards." wry laughter "I just wanted to see the future, you know. What it holds for our little country...or the whole humanity. But I want some rest now.

"Why are you telling me all this then?"

"Because when someone dies, his or her conscience's task is to teach that someone."

"Ah..."

"But I think you will be fine now. So...take revenge, fix a life or just have fun, it's up to you!" he turned around and started to walk away

"Wait! How do you do this ...thing?"

"Just stay close to your choice and whisper."

And he disappeared around the corner.

He was right about the time. I spent the next two days wandering around Budapest and thinking. But it felt like an hour for me. I had to figure out what to do. I immediately decided not to search for my family as it would be too heartbreaking, and I don't need that. My boyfriend? (Yep, I was gay.) Nah! Still too heartbreaking. So maybe I should start something new. Take revenge, fix a life or just have fun? I ran into people all the time who were strangely glowing. But noone seemed to give a damn. I decided it must be the way it is indicated for me who is free and who is not. But those who were free weren't souless murderers because they didn't have a conscience or anything like that. I guess there was just a plateau in their life.

Without any intention I walked into a bar. It was nice, but a kinda snob place where my past self wouldn't drink. It was full of these typical party-goingers and slutty chicks. I don't even know why I walked in, but when i wanted to turn around and leave for good I saw this guy. The guy sitting at the counter on a barstool. He was flirting with a girl who seemed entertained but not interested. He had blonde hair, dark eyes, was quite lanky but I could tell he was doing some kind of sports. Carefully shaved. And he was wearing a thight-fitting tucked in shirt. And of course the newest iPhone was resting next to his arm. And thank God he was glowing. That minute I knew I wanted him to be my... agh how do you say this? So you know. I quickly stood next to him to make things sure. And now it was official.

Despite the fact how enthusiastic I was at first, things were pretty awkward. I didn't know how to do this. It seemed so complicated for me, so the first few days were spent with creeping around him or putting my hand in his face and silly things like that. At least I was having a good time. And by the way I was right about the sport thing. He played football at his university. Every other day his team had practises in the school's gymnasium. T-shirts were often taken off and I would lie if I told I didn't enjoy it. However, there was no sexual desire I felt...I can't really explain this as I don't know how things work either. But I think I should be grateful, as it will be easier this way. So most of the time I just stood there while they were playing. And... the sight was so familiar, I couldn't tell why though.

Man! He IS scrawny! Wait, I feel something. There's something with this...guys and fitness level...God, if only I could recall all my memories. 

As I was brainstorming with me and myself the practise was over and the team went to take a piss, a shower whatsoever. But my chosen one walked over to a vending machine, bought a halfliter-coke and chugged it down at once. After the amusing performance he let out a loud belch.

"Watch out buddy,don't let it get to you!" some other guy laughed and patted his belly.

Oh my God, that's it! It finally clicked. I want to make him gain weight!